Blocked

I've started scheduling a day to write each week. It's been ages since I've written anything of substance.

Embrace the Beard

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N'awlins with a Drawl

“N’awlins, mom. It’s pronounced with a drawl,” I explained. Touristy knick knacks in hand and munching on a pecan praline, I maneuvered my way through the crowds on Canal Street, back toward the Marriott and my final night in New Orleans. A first year sponsor and third year conference attendee pro, I traveled to the 2012 Sigma Tau Delta Convention excited to fulfill my new role. As a volunteer moderator on a regional poetry panel that included our Chapter president, I mentally prepared myself to ask dazzling and insightful questions that encouraged audience members to remain engaged and invested in modern prose, while not sounding like a complete nerd. “Mom, I met some amazing people at the Sponsor Luncheon and now I have the poetry panel and then tonight we’re going to the Mahalia Jackson Theatre to see Salomé. It’s only in town this one weekend,” I added, eager to brag about the travel itinerary I’d put together for the trip. With pre-purchased tickets to see the New Orleans Opera production of Oscar Wilde’s Salomé, maps of the French Quarter and local cemeteries, travel guides checked out from the University library and four copies of a three-day itinerary, our group set out to conquer the Crescent City. We ate Café Du Monde beignets every morning, easing ourselves into the crowded restaurant while other tourists stood confused by the crowd and clamor of the packed courtyard. We chatted with friendly bartenders at hole-in-the-wall joints who gave us tips on nightlife and snapped our fingers along with local jazz musicians. We braved the St. Charles Streetcar up to the Garden District and got lost searching for New Orleans’ best po’boy at Parasol’s. Still, the magic of an academic conference in New Orleans was not lost on us. Through a literary lens, we gazed onto the streets of Storyville, hoping to catch a glimpse of Bellocq’s Ophelia or Anne Rice’s Lestat. At the conference, we shared stories of home, stories of death and stories of love, opening up to our peers and learning from each other’s experiences. We made plans for local outings with regional chapters, exchanging email addresses and hugs as we promised to send out a revised version of the piece we read. “I’ve got to go, mom. I’m getting on the lift and it’s a really confusing, supposedly “smart” elevator, so I have to concentrate,” I said and hung up the phone as I squeezed in between a group of fellow lit nerds, red Steven Barclay badges hanging loosely around their necks. I smiled at the woman nearest me. She had white powdered sugar crusted lightly on her collar and a Sigma Tau Delta canvas book bag slung over her shoulder. Definitely the kind of girl to pronounce N’awlins with a drawl.

© 2012 Rebecca Renee Hess

hey girl...

I'm totally obsessed with the hunger games right now. I also love Ryan Gosling and all the "Hey Girl" memes. This is my new favorite.

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Game of Thrones returns this week!!

The best novel turned tv show returns this weekend to HBO. I am so excited to see Game of Thrones, even though me and my tv watching crew will be a week behind HBO due to cable television deterrents and busy ass weeks. Still, April 8 we will begin watching Season 2 and I wanted to share this fun little GoT tidbit. Go Team Stark!!

Too Fat

If you know me personally, you know that I have a bit more cushion for the pushin'. I do not let that fact get in the way of living my life, though. I have a loving family, lots of great friends and a fulfilling career that I enjoy for the most part. Since childhood, I have struggled with weight, the stigmas surrounding it and the repercussions that come with being obese. For the first time in a long time, I am thinking about what I can do to seriously facilitate a change in my body. I am not happy with myself, and so I have decided to try something different. It's difficult because eating habits rear up and bite me in the ass on a daily basis. I am finally contemplating what I eat, why I eat, how I eat--and it is scary and a bit sad. I've been juicing for 3 days now, with a slight fall from the wagon last night during the Walking Dead season finale (beer and cookies, yum!) but I am back on with conviction. Pray that God will give me strength to accomplish my goals. I am writing a daily diary, but don't plan to publish it until I'm a ways through the program. I am doing this on my own, without consulting a doctor, so I do not recommend following my lead. I just figure that my fat ass has enough calories to last me a week or so, until my appointment with my doc, and then I will get on a real program. I just have had enough of being too fat to do...anything. So, along with a strict fruit and veggie juice diet, daily exercise and a lot of prayer and support, let's hope I can shed some pounds without surgery. I am 30- something years old, and I finally realized that I don't want to be this size forever. It will be easier to lose the weight now than at 40 or 50. I don't want diabetes, high cholesterol, bad knees--I want to have another baby before I'm 36. I want to play in the park with my kid. I want to ride a bike! Dammit, I want a lot that is just out of my reach right now--when a twinkie never is. So, there is my reasoning. If I'm acting like a bitch, it's cause I miss caffeine.

Sweet N'awlins Song

Overhead, the gray of a Louisiana sky

makes me longingly dream of fresh pecan pie

and the warmest beignets of the fried variety--

after a night without the slightest sobriety.

Daquiri bars look like ice cream shops

and colorful beads fall from the tree tops.

French Quarter blues blare in my head--

tomorrow morning I’m gonna wish I was dead.

The old Mississip’ seems so far away--

let’s just go get another beignet.

The bookshops of Storyville, quiet and quaint

tell of Bellocq’s Ophelia, who was never a saint.

When the skies open here, God’s wrath falls fast--

one looks to cities of sin in the past.

Sodom and Gomorrah-- of course, Babylon--

they all fell into infamous oblivion,

but here in N’awlins, in the land of the free,

we’ve the right to live and die on Bourbon Street--

to wander on street cars down Canal or Saint Charles,

to get lost strolling Constance in search of Parasol’s.

Take me down South! To New Orleans.

I don’t have no money and I don’t have no means--

but within my soul a sweet music burns

and inside my heart a deep longing yearns

for days and nights in the Crescent City,

to fall asleep late and wake up feeling shitty.

I’ll work in a bar or Cafe Du Monde

where waiters and waitresses do what they want.

I will smoke all day and drink all night--

I will cuss and spit and fuck and fight!

I promise to always say “yes sir” and “ma’am”.

that Southern charm will have ‘em eating out of my hand.

Just let me stay here, in dear N’awlins town,

I won’t make a peep and I won’t make a sound--

 The locals will think I was born and bred.

Do not doubt when you’ve heard it said,

“She will do well down in old N’awlins town.

She knows how to wobble and break it down,

she sings on the corner her sweet N’awlins song--

when we tried to leave, she refused to come along.”

© 2012 Rebecca Renee Hess

Bourbon Street. February 29, 2012